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"Mom can't I change into something else so I'm not walking in pee soakedleotards?"I wanted the ground to swallow me up so I can die I am so embarrassed. "Noyou can't control yourself like a big boy. I mean a big girl; I'm going totreat you like a baby." I hope you like wearing diapers, because you are going to have to be re-potty trained I can see that for sure."Looking down at the floor while we walk because I don't want to see people'sfaces as they give me dirty looks like going potty in your clothes is afatal disease or something."What do you mean mommy." Hearing mom say I have to be potty trained again.Mommy stops and bends down looking me in the eyes.I have a scared look on my face. "You will have to be potty trained againmeaning I will keep you in diapers and then after a couple weeks I'll letyou start to use the bathroom when you need to go." What do you mean keep me in diapers you mean when were home or just fornight time so no one sees me wearing them?"Mom stares back in my. 6. The four seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??-ORYou can retire to California where...1. You make over $450,000 and you still can’t afford to buy a house.2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.3. You know how to eat an artichoke.4. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.5. The four seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud and Drought.-OR-You can retire to New York City where...1 You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can’t find Wisconsin on a map.3. You think Central Park is “nature.”4. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.5. You’ve worn out a car horn. (IF you have a car.)6. You think eye contact is an act of aggression-OR-You can retire to Michigan where...1. You only.
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